PART I:
Foundation of Everything

Getting the Most Out of Discipleship

The Heart of Formation

The formation of a living, growing disciple involves much more than merely receiving the sacraments. We must be disposed to the grace offered; we must cooperate with that grace. The sacraments are not magical events—they are divine encounters that require human cooperation. We must seek God and allow Him to set our hearts on fire. We must perceive the Journey of life and intentionally progress along that path. Seeking the sacraments without seeking the Journey is hardly more than superstition.

The sacraments work powerfully on those who are open to them. Baptism plants a seed that must be tended. Confession frees those who sincerely desire to please the Lord. The Eucharist most fully nourishes the soul that is already aflame. Confirmation is meant to mark a wholehearted decision to follow Christ and to intentionally become a living, growing disciple. Marriage calls us to die to ourselves and reflect the sacrificial love of Christ for His church.

The fruit of sacramental grace must be discipleship. This discipleship isn’t just an add-on—it’s the intended goal of sacramental grace; it’s the natural result! For the sacraments to fill our lives with the abundant life Christ offers, we must not only be open to their grace but also actively pursue that abundant life.

This pursuit is more than simply attending a religious class or your typical Bible study—it’s about more than just gaining knowledge. Genuine formation isn’t merely about agreeing with beliefs; it’s about truly being set free by the truth.

The formation of a living, growing disciple offers an encounter with Jesus Christ and calls us to take up our cross and follow Him. This formation carefully and thoroughly applies the Gospel to our lives. It challenges the disciple and establishes clear benchmarks. Most importantly, it connects us with a living, growing disciple who offers support throughout the formation process. After all, the fire is caught, not taught.

This is a serious, intentional cooperation with the transformative power of knowing and loving the Lord, humbly opening our hearts to His grace. No one climbs the Mountain of God by aimlessly riding a scooter through the streets of Catholic City! Neither does anyone even get to the foothills by habitually attending Mass without truly examining or challenging their life in Christ.

You don’t accidentally accomplish much of anything!

All disciples need ongoing formation. By ongoing, we mean formation after the Church’s basic formation and the reception of the sacraments of initiation. Ongoing formation means lifelong growth. It’s not something we complete—it’s something we continually deepen. Of course, please continue reading even if you haven’t yet received the sacraments.

So, let’s take a closer look at what a solid ongoing formation might include.

Three Proven Paths to Growth

We recommend three methods for ongoing formation: the mentor approach (one-on-one), the discipleship quad approach (a 4-person team), and the Paladin small church community approach (6-10 people). Let’s briefly discuss each of these.

Mentor

A mentor helps a less experienced Christian of the same gender become a living, growing disciple or develop as one. Mentoring involves one-on-one meetings held weekly, monthly, or at other regular intervals. They might meet for a few years or longer.

The main advantage of mentoring is the chance for more personalized instruction and discussion. Ideally, they continue working together until the apprentice becomes a mature disciple ready to mentor others, and possibly longer. Mentors might also encourage involvement in a discipleship quad or small church community.

Mentoring is typically more effective at forming disciples than small church communities. However, recent research suggests that discipleship quads are even more successful than either method.

Mentoring is a highly traditional approach to forming disciples. Barnabas mentored Paul, who then mentored Timothy and others. These influential evangelists preached to many; however, they only took on a few apprentices for one-on-one mentoring over an extended period.

Discipleship Quad

A quad consists of four members of the same sex who meet forty-four times over a year to become living, growing disciples or to mature as disciples. The quad has a founder, but the four take turns leading. If everyone leads, then there isn’t really a leader. I cannot help but wonder if some of these quads even have a living, growing disciple among them.

Franciscan University of Steubenville offered the discipleship quad program that I reviewed. This program provides clear guidance and materials to support the formation process. Discipleship quads offer clearer benchmarks and accountability than small church communities. The smaller group size and the fact that all members are of the same sex foster greater intimacy and accountability than is usually found in a small church community. The additional members and the basic equality among them likely encourage more camaraderie than the mentor approach. The folks at Steubenville claim that research shows discipleship quads are the most effective method for forming disciples. The approach also prepares members to create new quads.

The small church community offers some advantages over the discipleship quad. Some people prefer the lower level of intimacy and accountability that a small church community usually provides. Many individuals seek support with fewer direct challenges. Additionally, the discipleship quad uses the same year-long material for each new group. While this approach works well for multiplication, it can feel limiting to never update or expand the material to include new topics. Maybe the disciple could consider leading small church communities after a few years to diversify and explore new material, especially if they don’t feel called to start a new quad.

The quad leader is the least traditional of the three approaches. In the quad, the four members rotate through the leadership role; all are equal in this regard. The rotating leader acts as a facilitator; there is no designated leader. However, despite this “leaderless” model, we always insist that there be at least one living, growing disciple in the group to provide sound input and ignite the fire in the others. We insist that the fire within should be kindled by someone who already burns with that fire—a living, growing disciple. Of course, the Lord doesn’t need anyone else to ignite the fire; however, this is usually how it happens.

Paladin Small Church Community

Paladin small church communities meet weekly during the spring and fall for a discussion series. Ideally, these groups include 6-10 members of both genders. They are the only option for couples to join together, and parents can also bring their young adult children. Unlike quads, multiplication occurs when the group reaches 10 or more members and has completed all the foundational discussion series. At this point, it will split into two smaller groups, each inviting new members.

Paladin small church communities usually meet 16-20 times a year. Their commitment is solely to the current discussion series, which generally includes 8-10 meetings. This commitment is less demanding than the quad or mentor approach. The Paladin small church community adopts a “come-and-see” philosophy; new members are often invited to a fellowship dinner after a discussion series concludes or the first meeting of a new one.

Disciple formation remains the primary focus; however, support, fellowship, sharing, and ongoing learning are also stressed. The small church community will emphasize the social aspect more than the other two approaches. These communities will best fulfill our need for community and general support. They tend to be less structured than the other approaches, usually with fewer clear benchmarks and looser accountability. Overall, these communities aim to welcome everyone while still encouraging each person on their Journey to God. Often, both discipleship quads and mentoring are more effective at forming disciples than any form of small church community.

The community begins each new group with the same two foundational discussion series; however, after that, the leader has greater freedom to choose materials, unlike in the discipleship quad. And if the leader is willing to select a book and design his own Paladin discussion series, then the options are truly limitless.

The Paladin small church community leaders operate more as facilitators than mentors or instructors. The materials serve as the “instructor,” while the leader helps people understand and apply them in their lives. This approach differs significantly from the traditional mentor-apprentice relationship.

The Paladin small church community (SCC) most closely resembles the church in the early centuries. Not everyone had a mentor like St. Paul; however, everyone had a supportive, close-knit church gathering in someone’s home.

Whether we grow through a mentor, a quad, or an SCC, the path of discipleship always involves the same essential ingredients. Let’s look at four key areas every disciple must develop.

Four Pursuits of the Living Disciple

Discipleship entails ongoing growth across multiple areas. Prayer and discipline are central among them, but there are many others as well. However, we will focus on four specific pursuits that we should encourage in others, whether they are meeting with a mentor, a quad, or an SCC.

Discipleship Prayer

Disciples must make decisive prayers of commitment to Christ. These prayers go beyond simply reciting our beliefs or even renouncing Satan’s temptations and worldly attractions. Instead, they involve intentionally surrendering to Jesus and dedicating our lives to Him and His mission. Such prayers are vital at the close of a discussion series, retreat, or other spiritual activity.

Below is a sample Discipleship Prayer:

Lord Jesus, I need You. More than the parched need water, more than the weary need rest, more than the lonely need companionship, I need You. Thank You for seeking me out like the lost sheep, for welcoming me like the father of the prodigal son. Thank You for laying down Your life for my sake, for bridging the great chasm between God and mankind, and for allowing me to truly become a child of God by integrating my life into Your life. I open myself to You, and I surrender my life to You. I promise to seek You more fully through prayer, the practice of the virtues, and service to others. May I live joyfully and fearlessly in Your Spirit, offering generous service. And may I embrace Your great commission and help others become living, growing disciples. All praise and glory be Yours, now and forever. AMEN.

Of course, a Discipleship Prayer should fuel an action plan with clear goals and detailed strategies. Plan your journey! 

Rule of Life

Disciples need a plan to progress on their Journey to God. Just as we carefully plan our education, careers, and budgets, we must also intentionally plan our spiritual journey. We should organize our days to deepen our prayer, knowledge, and virtue; to more fully experience the nearness of Christ and His peace, joy, and love. We need to develop a disciplined plan to slow down and create more space for God in our lives. This plan serves as our rule of life.

Our rule of life is a set of guidelines and commitments that direct our spiritual journey. These typically include various devotions such as scheduled times for daily prayer and meditation, religious study, fasting, acts of charity, an annual retreat, and similar practices. When developing our rule, we should challenge ourselves—especially in areas where growth is needed—while also avoiding making it too burdensome. We should introduce new devotions or commitments gradually and regularly reassess our rule of life. Reevaluating it with a mentor can often be very helpful.

We highly recommend that you create your rule of life while reading Our Forgotten Journey to God as a group; however, new members who miss this opportunity should read the book individually and develop their own rule of life.

Every saint had some form of a rule—not to constrain their freedom, but to anchor it in love.

As you regularly revisit your rule of life, you will undoubtedly address the Lord’s Great Commission, as it is so central to discipleship.

Evangelization

The living, growing disciple must embrace the Great Commission and help form new disciples. As living, growing disciples, nothing is more important than making progress on our journey and helping others do the same. A living, growing disciple feels compelled to share their faith and help others along the Journey to God.

Evangelization is not mainly about proselytizing, apologetics, or other persuasive tactics. Nor is it principally about reading books, witnessing miracles, or even prayer. While all of these are important and helpful, they are not the primary focus of our work as evangelists.

Evangelization is simply sharing who Jesus is and what He has done in our lives. Period. The most persuasive witness is joy—joy that springs from knowing Him. Of course, evangelization also involves finding and creating opportunities to do this—utilizing situations as they arise. Some of us will need to make Christ and evangelization a higher priority in our lives. Some will need to become more outgoing and friendly; others will need to expand their social circles. Most of us will need to step outside our comfort zones.

And, of course, we evangelize through our example of faith, hope, and love; peace, joy, and charity; humility, openness, and generosity. After all, we must be credible witnesses. Naturally, our journey mindset eases some of the pressure on us; we gladly acknowledge that we are fellow pilgrims who still have a long way to go on the Journey to God.

As we evangelize through our service, it becomes part of the Great Commission; however, our service is also a natural expression of discipleship in its own right.

Service

All disciples are called to serve. They may serve through ministry by directly supporting the Church as catechists, lectors, and in other roles to assist the local parish. Alternatively, they may serve through an apostolate, reaching outside the Church as evangelists, pro-life advocates, Bible study leaders, SCC leaders, Catholic apologists, Catholic parents, and more. Usually, disciples participate in both ministries and apostolates, with some overlap often occurring between them. For example, an SCC open to fallen-away Catholics and non-Catholics might be seen as both. However, some people consider anything not directly overseen by the Church to be an apostolate, regardless of who benefits from it.

Sometimes, it can be difficult to recognize the path of service God is calling us to. Sometimes, it helps to identify the gifts God has given us as His disciples. A gift inventory can help you discern your gifts (see “Appendix C: Gift Inventory”).

Remember, it is in the giving that we receive. Service is equally essential for our personal growth as it is for those we help. Service, much like the practice of virtues overall, deepens our relationship with God and enriches our prayer life.

Commit and Begin the Journey

We strongly encourage you to participate in one of the three formation methods mentioned earlier—mentoring, discipleship quads, or SCC. Our primary focus has been on SCCs because they are the most accessible option for the most significant number of people. Although the other two methods might be more transformative, the average person—a practicing Catholic or otherwise—is more likely to join an SCC. These communities best meet people where they are.

Choose one path—mentor, quad, or SCC—and commit to it. Don’t just read about discipleship; actively engage in it.

Of course, this book primarily focuses on Paladin SCCs, so the next part of this book will explore the Paladin vision for SCCs.

To Community →

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Questions to Contemplate

1. Sacraments and Discipleship – How does the chapter describe the relationship between the sacraments and discipleship? Why is it dangerous to receive the sacraments without truly seeking the Journey of discipleship? How have the sacraments nourished your own spiritual journey? 
2. Ongoing Formation – What does “ongoing formation” mean, and why is it essential for discipleship after receiving the sacraments of initiation? What does ongoing formation look like in your daily walk with God right now, and where do you feel you need to grow?
3. Formation Approaches (Mentor, Quad, SCC) – What are your initial thoughts on these three methods of ongoing formation? How do you envision mentoring and SCCs operating in the early church? Which of the three approaches appeals most to you personally, and why? What hesitations or hopes do you have about stepping into that approach?
4. The Four Pursuits of Growth (Prayer, Rule of Life, Evangelization, Service) – What are your initial thoughts on these four pursuits of growth? What really stood out to you? Why are all four necessary for discipleship, rather than focusing on just one or two? Which of these four areas feels most alive in your journey right now, and which area needs the most attention?
5. Personal Commitment to the Journey – Why does the chapter stress that discipleship is a matter of intentional choice, not something that happens by accident? What is the common view of discipleship among Catholics that you know? What concrete step are you willing to commit to in your own discipleship journey—whether joining a group, deepening prayer, or serving others?